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Are you ever asked to fund loans, gifts, or an economic recovery package for your date, as if you’re their personal banker with benefits? Ever feel like you’re bankrolling your dating relationship without receiving an equal expression of effort or appreciation from your date?

These are red flags warning you to put on the brakes–unless you don’t care if you’re loved for your money. How can you ever know for sure if it’s you or your assets that attract your dates?

You can create Love Tests that detect the gold rush girls or guys, the con artists, the social climbers. Then you decide whether to let your date manipulate you for money, or move on to meet a more compatible match.

How do you create this Love Test?

When your date starts asking you for gifts, donations, loans or cash, shut down the bank and see what happens. You can do this gracefully, by saying all of your assets are tied up in trusts or foundations. You can say that money issues are a top cause of relationship stress and breakups. And you’d like to experience what it’s like to live within your date’s financial means, so you understand their challenges, pressures and attitudes about spending. You could say that dating isn’t about money, but common interests, good communication, chemistry and kindness.

What are the risks in shutting the door of your bank to your dates?

A gold rush girl or guy seeking the seductive perks or a share of your money may move on. Or they may keep up their sensual or sly manipulations to see if they can break down your defenses so you open your wallet or purse to keep them in your life.

What if you see and enjoy their clever con for cash?

If you’re tempted by great chemistry or physical beauty to marry a match who seems overly interested in your assets, don’t walk down the aisle without this: An ironclad pre-nup.

If this makes your match run, you’ve saved yourself the distress and expense of a battle in divorce court.

Check with a counselor to find out why you’re open to this type of dating arrangement. With a little coaching you may let that old baggage go, so you’re free to love and be loved, to know and be known for all the priceless wonders you bring and hope to receive in a loving relationship.

I think the greatest aspect of our life is to find, sustain, grow and embrace a gratifying outcome of our dating relationship. We have a gift to embrace and express deep emotions of love. A gift that so many of us take it granted. We let it slip away from us and inevitably causing our dating relationship to die away. We need to recapture that feeling and not take it for granted as we continue our journey toward the meaning of true love.

Here are some ways to start and keep your dating relationship alive:

Define who you are and define what you want. Not knowing you and not knowing what you want will never maintain your dating relationship. As we look for love, we tend to get what comes our way. Don’t settle for less. It’s important that you know what you want. Knowing exactly what you want-values, interests, things you can tolerate will start your relationship steady and healthy.

Learn how to control disagreement. Always avoiding conflict will bring any dating relationship to an end. You avoid any conflict to make the relationship work but it will not. Avoiding conflict will build so much resentment that soon; it will explode to a definite break up. Learn to disagree in a fair manner. Understand there are two sides of any disagreement.

Speak with passion. Relationship is built around genuineness. Sometimes we need to voice our opinion with great passion. This will show that you care very much. Your partner will understand and respond with passion. Say what’s on your mind.

Be responsible for your actions. When you make a mistake, don’t blow it off. Don’t make up any excuses. When you do something wrong, simply apologize. When your partner does something special, always express your appreciation. Being responsible both ways will certainly embrace your dating relationship.

Don’t be a loner. Don’t feel like you can do whatever you want in a relationship without talking with your partner. This is one of the greatest mistakes made in a dating relationship. Discuss what you want to do. Maybe your partner might offer a better idea.

Get outside help if needed. If your relationship is in trouble, do not hesitate to get help. Many times friends and significant others can see the problem. Since they are not in your relationship, they tend not to be bias. Listen to them. Most time than not, they will certainly give you some great insight.

Here are 5 of the most common myths to having a stable dating relationship. It seems good at the time, but some things you do in a relationship will be harmful. Bringing both of you closer is the magic within a relationship. Having a stable relationship can lead both of you to the next level without any complication.

1. You don’t have to like everything about your partner.

It’s great that you are trying to accept your love one but you need to express some of your dissatisfaction. A common behavior can be leaving the toilet seat up after use or not changing the toilet paper roll when it runs out. Keep in mind that this is just a behavior mishap and not the true essence of that person.

2. With your charisma, you can change your partner.

You shouldn’t try to change your partner because you think you can. Just because you can use your charm and your fines, it will be the wrong way to approach it. This will lead to an obsessive-possessive relationship and that is not what you want at all. You need to accept and allow your partner to grow and flourish with you.

3. I have to give up the things I like to do in order to be in a stable relationship.

Giving up the things you like in a relationship will slowly eat you away. Your relationship is special because of the uniqueness you do as well as your partner. So, when you give up the things you like to do, you will be taking away part of your relationship.

4. I will be taken care of.

Don’t expect to have someone to just come along and take care of you even if you were conditioned to think this way. You bring passion and fire. Some days you should be the one to take care of your partner. You will create a stable relationship with your strength and weakness.

5. It will be expensive to be in a dating relationship.

It’s all about perspective. Don’t think a stable relationship is about bigger house, a better car or a motorcycle. This kind of thinking will not stabilize your relationship. A stable relationship is built on simple things in life, walking together, going on a romantic picnic or sharing a chocolate. Showing what’s inside and not the outside of the heart is a cornerstone for a stable relationship.

Quarrels and fights are necessary to keep a mature relationship healthier. Every other couple every once in a while indulge in quarrels. If someone has never fought with his spouse then he has surely missed one interesting aspect of his so called mature relationship. Fights followed by a series of persuasion and various means of inducement hold a unique importance for a relationship. Many a times such small fights lead to petty clashes which later gets brushed off by the couple and other times it can be justified to arrive at a common consensus. In such cases it’s better to simply agree to disagree. This is what’s expected out of a mature relationship even if there arises some difference in the ideas.

The clashing of ideas for a couple is not something very uncommon. It certainly cannot be that one be the mirror image of his spouse when talking about ideas or opinions. Everyone has got their own identity and uniqueness, the freedom of thought varies from person to person. It doesn’t matter if the concerned persons are already in a mature relationship; arguments are bound to happen when there is a difference in opinion over a particular subject.

It’s a misconception of the people which makes them believe that couples involved in a mature relationship should never have any disagreements at all. A young couple feels their romantic relation is to last forever, so they are caught off guarded upon facing any situations like minor fights or heated arguments. In turn both the spouses hide their own opinions in order to avoid any sort of altercation. They may be right in their own ways but the question is if theirs is really a mature relationship, will it get affected by any argument or disagreement.

A difference of opinion or any minor altercation is needed for a good and mature relationship as it facilitates the couple to get used to the opinions and behaviors of their partners. But it should also be kept in mind that the disagreements should be taken with a positive frame of mind, it should not offend your partner nor should you feel offended for the opposition. You need not be silent when you feel you have a different opinion with your partner; you can surely go ahead and let him know what your thoughts are. A minor disagreement followed by a logical discussion and finally dismissing the differences is the sign of a mature relationship.

Nevertheless, do not start fighting with your partner just to term it as a mature relationship if you have genuinely nothing to complain and you share the same opinions with your partner. Learning to have healthy disagreements will allow your mature dating relationship to go to new levels. It’s when the disagreement escalates into a harmful fight that it is not good. Keep things non-emotional and allow one another to voice their opinion and feelings. You would rather the honesty of this type of relationship than the deceit of anything else. Mature dating relationship are built on two people who know how to fight well.

There are smart ways to begin a relationship and some not so smart ways to. But really when you think of 3 ways to start your dating relationship you want to focus on the smart ways to start it, not the ones that may set you up for failure and have a relationship that will run a short course and be quickly over.

So let’s look at the 3 best ways that you can begin a relationship, and even some extra tips in there to make sure that you keep it going. Because in life we all want to have a lasting relationship and one that we are continually happy in, not one where we often wonder why were are there.

First off you should never rush a guy into a full commitment, because it may be one thing that will push him away. If you really want him to be around for a long time, just let him work his way into that commitment. No matter how hard it is for women, you need to make sure that you do this. No nagging no pushing, but let him take his own pace to get to that feeling that he is ready to commit to you and it will happen.

As women there are times when you may actually act dumb to make a guy feel better. Don’t feel bad if you may be smarter than your guy either. Because well you should never have to act like someone you are not to make a relationship work. Cause if you are then you are building a relationship that is based on lies to a point and will never work for a long time.

Third make sure that you do not base your relationship on purely sexual feelings. Sure lust is great, and when you first meet that match of yours and hit it off, this will be something that will be in the front of the relationship.

But letting lust be the only guide and the main thing that holds your relationship together is definitely something that will backfire on you. Because one day that lust will die out and if you have nothing else for a relationship it will fizzle quickly and end just as fast.

Instead make sure that you communicate and have many things in common to have a lasting relationship. Be honest and be yourself and you will have a way to have a lasting and fully committed relationship with the match and the person you love.

Let’s say you have an upcoming date. If you want to do well on this date what would you do in preparation? This information is a dating tip for men as many times us guys aren’t so good at answering this question. Many guys don’t think about how important the first impression really is. Yet we always expect the girl to look her best. But guys, this applies to you also. Make sure you get a haircut and shave before the big date. After all, you are making your first impression on her. If this girl is a great catch you don’t want to be unprepared.

Then for your initial date choose a public spot. Often, this will make the woman feel safer. If you have met from an online dating site this is especially important for men to think about. Caring for her needs will make dating more comfortable for her. In the very beginning, keep the dates short as this will help you manage risk. Short dates could easily be around lunch time or to just get a quick snack. Such types of quick meeting up can allow you an opportunity to see more about her personality. If it doesn’t work out then you don’t have too much time of being out on the date. After all even if you have been chatting and emailing someone for weeks, there may be a big difference in their true characteristics. Her true personality may be revealed in that quick day date. This will help you to discover more about her mannerisms in a way that online dating will never allow.

During the date stay respectful as this will reflect on you and your personality. It is easy to do if you like the person but to be nice and courteous when things aren’t going so well is another challenge. It is best to try to take the relationship slowly until you have learned more about the person’s real character. At the end of the date it’s a good idea to send the date a follow up email. If you liked her, that would be your chance to talk about a follow up date. If you aren’t interested in seeing her again, this is your opportunity to close off the communication in a respectful way.